In the Light of Truth

26. The claim of children on their parents

Many children live under a fatal delusion, the result of which will do them the greatest harm. They think they can charge their parents with having been the cause of their life on earth, and one often hears it said: “Naturally my parents must provide for me, for they brought me into the world. It is not my fault that I am here.”

That is the most foolish thing they could say. Every individual is here on earth either because he has begged for the privilege, or because of his sins. The only office of the parents is to give the soul the opportunity to incarnate. And every incarnated soul should be grateful for the opportunity that is granted it.

The soul of the child is but the guest of its parents. It has no spiritual claim on them, and the mundane claims have been developed out of purely mundane social laws, authorised by the state in order to exempt it from having any responsibility.

Spiritually the child is a separate, independent individual. With the exception of its physical body, the tool it needs for its activity on earth, it has received nothing from its parents — only just a domicile that the incarnating soul could make use of.

Still, as the parents have furnished this abode, it is their duty to take care of it till the soul who has taken possession is able to care for it itself. The development of the child's body will decide when this is to take place. What exceeds this office is a gift from the parents.

Hence it is time that children should discontinue to rely on their parents and rather look to become independent as soon as possible. They must work for themselves, it does not matter whether they work at home or elsewhere. It must be work, not amusement and the mere fulfilling of social duties, but the doing of some definite, useful duty that another person would have to be engaged to do if the child did not attend to it. Only in such cases can one speak of leading a useful life on earth: such a life matures and develops the spirit. If a child male or female does its duty in this way in its parent's house, it should get the same salary for its work that the parents would pay a stranger. In other words, such a child must be respected and treated in the way an independent human being has a right to be treated. If parents and children are united by special bonds of love, of confidence and of friendship, so much the better for both. Such ties are entered into voluntarily, and are based upon the inner conviction and thus so much the more valuable. Such ties are genuine and endure after physical death. In the next world they serve to promote their mutual advancement and happiness.

But when children have reached a certain age, it is not desirable that they should continue subject to family rules and family thraldom. Neither have aunts, uncles, cousins or other relations any claims on the child whatever. This is an objectionable abuse of relationship which must disgust a free and independent spirit. These customs are due to tradition and have, unfortunately, become so ingrained that in most cases nobody tries to think differently and independently but resigns himself, although reluctantly. He, however, who troubles to think it over from an unbiased standpoint will inwardly be revolted at its preposterous absurdity and turn away in disgust.

All this unnatural nonsense must be done away with. A new and healthy generation will not suffer its continuance because it offends all healthy principles. If man is to be fettered by such artificially distorted views of life, he can never produce anything really great. A man will be more hindered than he thinks by these ties which may seem of secondary importance. To free all men, every individual should cast aside these unworthy fetters. Genuine freedom lies in doing what one recognises oneself as a duty. Only then can a claim be justified. And this applies to children also; only those, who do their duty faithfully have a right to claim.

But parents also have many pressing duties to fulfil that have nothing to do with the claims of children. Every grown-up should know what bringing a child into the world involves. The mischief done by wantonness, carelessness and thoughtlessness (based on utterly wrong views) has taken a terrible revenge on man. You must know and understand that in the immediate proximity of material life on the physical plane, a great number of souls are waiting ready and expecting an opportunity to incarnate on earth; these are human souls retained by their Karma who are anxious to atone in a new life. As soon as the possibility presents itself, i. e. a birth is expected, they attach themselves to the expectant mother waiting for the little body to mature in which they purpose dwelling. During this period of waiting, invisible threads are spun between the child's body and the waiting soul who assiduously keeps as close as possible to the mother. When maturity is sufficiently advanced, these threads serve as a bridge to admit the stranger from the other world. This strange guest forthwith takes possession and his Karma, that accompanies him, may often cause grief and anxiety to his parents. A strange guest, what an uncanny thought! Something a mother should constantly keep in mind and never forget is that she also has the right of choice among the waiting souls, if she does not let the time she has be wasted carelessly.

Incarnation is subject to the law of attraction; still it is not absolutely necessary that the incarnating soul should be attracted by the parents, it may also be attracted by some person frequently in the company of the pregnant woman. When man knows how all happens and takes it into account, much mischief will be avoided. Now men wantonly toy with such matters, spending their time in gambling, dancing, and entertaining, utterly regardless of what important events are preparing — events that will play a leading role in their after-lives. Conscious prayer which should always be accompanied by intense wish, could greatly help to lessen the evil and strengthen the good, so that the little stranger who comes to live with them may in every respect remain a welcome guest to the parents.

The talk of pre-natal education is all nonsense. Conclusions drawn from misunderstood phenomena which appeared on the surface gave rise to this theory; It is not possible to train an unborn child; but, there is every possibility of influencing the attraction of a soul seeking to incarnate, if this is attended to in time with all serious intention. The result of attracting the right soul is immeasurably more important than what could be hoped for or expected from pre-natal education.

A human being who fully understands this and yet carelessly and thoughtlessly disregards it deserves no better than that a spirit should incarnate and intrude itself into his family circle, that later on becomes a constant source of trouble and perhaps danger.

To enlightened human beings, bringing a child into the world should merely be considered a proof of their willingness to receive a stranger as permanent guest into their family, in order to give him the opportunity to atone and to mature on earth. And only in cases where there is a heart-felt wish on both sides to attain this object, is it justifiable to give a soul the opportunity to incarnate.

When these facts are taken into serious consideration many of our present habits will change, as in the relations between members of a family, their manner of treating each other and education in general. All will be judged from a different and more serious standpoint. More consideration and more respect will be shown. Feelings of self-reliance and responsibility will become more general, which again will immensely further social advance, and children will learn to desist from claiming rights that were never rightfully theirs.

[Grail Message by Abdrushin]  [Resonances to the Grail Message]